okay okay... that's a really bad title for this, but essentially, that's what my next month is going to be.
last night, my girlfriend (of over 3 years) and i decided to take a one month fast from each other, in order to seek God's will for our lives individually as well as a couple. we are not broken up, nor are we planning on breaking up... this is just something we felt we needed to do, so we could properly seek the will of the Lord. neither of us wanted to be a distraction to the other during this important time in our lives, so we came to this agreement.
so here i am... day one. i've only been at this for 5 1/2 hours, and this is already really difficult. i've had to stop myself from calling or texting her at least 15 times. all i want to do right now is reassure her that i do love her and that i'm really excited for what this next month is going to do for us, but i'm sure she is aware of it. so, i trust that God is taking care of her, and i continue on with my day.
on the bright side, it's day one and i already feel like God is speaking to me. this morning, for the first time in entirely too long, i willingly and prayerfully got into my Bible, and i feel like God really placed a calling on me. i read the last chapter of 2 Timothy, where Paul exhorts Timothy to "do the work of an evangalist", "preach the Word" and "fulfill (his) ministry". i really felt like God was speaking directly to me through this. now if i could only peg down what my ministry is....
anyway, i'm going to try to write down my thoughts and what i'm dealing with every day during this next month, sort of as a journal... something i can refer back to and track the progress of my heart and walk with God.
so there you have it.... day one.
later.
matt
reading:
Bible - God
13 Ways to Ruin Your Life - Jarrod Jones
listening:
Mighty To Save - Hillsong (especially "From The Inside Out"... amazing song.)
Cosmos - The Send
Vheissu - Thrice
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1 comment:
Although it's never my place to question a calling or tug you feel, I thought I may offer a word of advice/input/2 cents if you will. You diligently write your thoughts and prayers, your hopes and feelings on the internet. While in no way a dig at you, I just am wondering why you haven't thought to take this to the next level. God's will and work of evangelism can be accomplished through so many venues, in addition to the literal preaching ministry. Have you thought to apply your skill for writing to something as your work? Not everyone knows at 5 years old what they want to be when they grow up...and then actually do it! It's normal to search (so I hear...), but start with a passion you already have- I had the passion to teach (and I know you remember that all too well!...spell "encyclopedia") and I took that, especially after my time at ACU, as my direct calling and work in ministry. I come in contact with so many people of so many ages, and I have the opportunity to show something different. Have you thought of trying the same with your passion? Think about it- you love sports. You're a great writer. Ever thought of pursuing a degree in communications skills? A Mass Communications and Journalism degree would allow you to work in print writing (maybe sports, tv, or radio. All of which you enjoy, correct? Maybe it wasn't that college was bad for you- maybe you just had the wrong place and time. Try looking at something from a new angle- or a new place. Christian Universities offer an entirely different level of prayer and support, helping you succeed in serving God like you want and need. Just some thoughts little bro- you know I'm here for you if you need it. And I'm definitely not saying it's what you should do- just offering perspective from a more recently "been there, done that" viewpoint. :)
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